It goes by too fast.

Enjoy it now because it goes by too fast. I kept hearing that from cute little old ladies. They looked down at my children and then would state that to me. Goes by too fast??!! Are you kidding me??!! At that time it felt like it was dragging on and on. Getting up at night with a barfing toddler that woke up his baby sisters, running after a child that was "bathing" the kitty, unplugging the toilet after they flushed their mittens and a toque, finger prints on walls, food stuck inside the couch, fingers slammed in doors, heartbreaks, puberty, learners licenses, stepping on Lego pieces that always finds that nice soft spot between the toes. Yeah lady it’s flying by!!!! I always felt like throwing a baby bottle or a full diaper at their wise and annoying faces. Stupid wise women.

I remember being with "T". He was 17 years old and he says "Mom, me and my girlfriend are going to have sex soon, so I was wondering if..." I started to try the door. It was locked. I clawed at the window. " Mom knock it off, we have to talk about this" I slumped in the seat. "Fine." I said "But don't ask me anything about birth control, that is obviously not my area of expertise" He rolled his eyes. "No Mom, I just don't want to...you know... hurt her, so what do I do?" Hell. This is hell. Some how I died and I was in hell.

"Mom, pay attention and quit saying oh my god."

What does he want from me? Some technique? Advice on sex? WHAT??!! So this is what came out of my mouth. " Know this son, its going to suck. Everyone's first time sucks. Your going to be clumsy, your going to lay on her hair, your going to not know where things go, you'll take half an hour to put on a condom...YOU WILL WEAR A CONDOM and when its all said and done, there will be no romantic music playing and a moment where you will feel like the world aligned. You will actually lay there and say.." is that, what everyone goes on about?" First times are a disaster, but if you get through it together and can actually talk about and get past it, both of you will get better at it." "T " Thought about it for a while. The car was silent. I stared out the window, wishing for a metor to land on us when "T" finally said " Does it have to suck?" "Yes" I said. "It can go less crappy then the average, but it rarely is wonderful until you grow up inside." Silence again.

"Thanks Mom."

"Welcome Son."

Then I said "T?"

He said "Yeah?"

I said " Don't you have some locker buddies to go over this stuff with?"

"T" says "Yeah but what do they know about not hurting a girl?"

"Good point."

"Yeah"


Being close in age with your child has its benefits but it comes with a cost of them being able to talk to you about anything. Horrifying. THIS was NOT in the manual. Stupid parents manual. I should drop kick this manual into my neighbor’s lawn.

Trevor graduated two years ago this June. On his graduation day he was so handsome, dressed in a white tux. He was annoyed with the heat in the place. So was I. He had saved a seat for me in the front. I was there with all his siblings, watching him up there with his friends. Grown up. I suddenly started to cry. Trevor was grown up, he was embarking on his own life now. My job was changing now for him. I was going to mentor him now, not raise him. I had raised him. "Tiny" reached up and wiped my tears. I looked down at her and it hit me. It does go by fast, too fast.

Amanda is graduating this year; I went with her to buy her grad dress. She beamed with joy when we found the right one. She hugged me when we made the payment. I stared at her in amazement. I just finished raising her too. Where has all the time gone? What happened to that little girl with blue eyes and blond hair that would run around the neighborhood naked? What happened to little bald "T" and his Osh Kosh overalls? The babies that would never grow up, did.

I look back at those old ladies, who don't look so old now, and I realize they were right. 17 years did fly by. I do know this too; I didn't let it get away from me.

I did enjoy it.